Unscriptable
by AkatsukiStalkers-RebelQueens
Summary: the government says my name is Sakura Senju, the insane teen born to a corrupt mother, and adopted into the Senju family. screw the government, i know who i am. I am Sakura Senju Haruno, the nutty pink girl and the second youngest member of the Akatsuki family. i will follow my own script, with this crazy cast of nut case sibling. so fuck you, government. Author: neko abby
1. Chapter 1

**Unscriptable**

Hi. My name is Sakura. Sakura Haruno. Or at least it use to be. The government thinks my name is Sakura Senju. Because I'm adopted. But I don't answer to Senju. Or miss Senju. Or Sakura Senju. I only answer to Sakura Haruno. Government be damned.

And this is the impossible story of me and my family. The government had scripted us into the system as the Senju family. We called ourselves the Akatsuki family. And the way we lived, with the action-packed story of the next 5 centuries, and the drama and trauma, I won't be surprised if after I write my biography when I'm older, this whole thing turns into a movie or a TV show.

Anyway, this is the amazing, wordless, ever-shocking and completely unscriptable story of Sakura Haruno and the Akatsuki family. I say Unscriptable, because I mean that if this does become a TV series or a sitcom, reading this script just wouldn't cut it. You could never manage to pull off the average day in a single 30-minute or 60-minute episode. Plus half the shit we do is illegal or too mature for TV. You couldn't write a script to match us.

Anyway… again… I bet your not interested in my ramblings _about_ my life musings, you found this story and you want to _read what happened in_ _my life_. I feel you, I feel you, so, let's start this train wreck going, shall we?

My adoptive mother is Tsunade Senju. I'm her 11th adoption, and I'm the second youngest. There is only one other girl in the list of adoptions.

Tsunade… yeah, Tsunade's my mom. I love her pretty much, more than the rest of this screwed up family. She can't have kids, and she just absolutely hates every male on earth even if she could, so yes, I see why she adopted.

What I don't see is why Tsunade decided to adopt ELEVEN kids. If you could call them kids. I'm one of the few of them that DIDN'T come from an insane asylum… even though the government says I did. And why she decided to get ME to join this stupid 10-children 1-parent household I also don't know.

I can't say I don't care about my… 'Family'. But I can't say I don't hate them, either. There's this stupid system they've developed long before I showed up, and they are like some weird sibling gang.

The oldest is Pein, he's a total nut job who thinks he's god and he likes to sit outside when it rains. I thought I was the only person who likes the rain over sun shine, so it was cool to meet Pein at first, because he also has a face full of metal. But after five minutes he turned into a complete creep with all his rants about how one day the world will 'fear the rath of god'…

Well, that had happened when I first showed up at the house. Literally only one hour, when I hadn't met anyone, I had been greeted by Pein. He is the apparent 'leader' of the other adoptees, and no one else was home at the moment because they had school, so Tsunade had left him here to greet me.

Yes, good job, mom, leave the developmental 17 year old god-complex teen to greet your newest adopted daughter. That should leave a GREAT impression; she was lucky I had ditched the social worker so she didn't see that Tsunade had left Pein alone at the house on a school day. Didn't like that social worker, she was way too nosy, so I was pretty glad when she bought that I just wanted to go it alone so the new family wouldn't feel 'intimidated'.

Of course I had learned later that Pein could be very diplomatic when he wanted to be, and that Pein had been called in sick anyway since he had caught a cold, so there was no way Tsunade could get in trouble.

But, anyway, Pein had showed me around Tsunade's house swiftly. It looked the same as it does today, of course back then it was a wonder how so many lived in this tiny little place.

One bed room had 5 bunk beds, a sixth to be assembled for my coming; however it was a loft bed instead of a bunk bed. I was to bunk under someone, as Pein told me the new bed was extra large to accommodate someone named 'Kisame'. Black painted walls and red-ish carpet, white popcorn ceiling. A giant closet and attached bathroom, though a lot of clothes were tucked away in containers under the bed. Of course the room was clean when I showed up, but every day it was a mess afterward. What do you expect with 9 teenage boys?

A decent size, though a little small, kitchen dining room combo, which honestly didn't have enough room for even half of this awkward family, and after my first arrival where it was clean like the bedroom, the dining room gradually built up a mountain of un-sort-able junk that was nearly impossible to clean. I'm pretty sure this is why the ants and rats got so bad, and if you one day felt like you could tackle that mess, a few hours later you were completely overwhelmed and you hadn't even made a dent. At least we never got roaches… right?

The living room was rather tiny as well, with a junky old TV set and a tattered old, yet very long couch and a shaky rocking chair recliner. The coffee table was wood and made to look clean on my first day… the next it had been blown up out in the front yard, then burned in the fireplace, so the next one was similar but the new surface was trashed in the first hour.

A hall connecting the living room to a second bathroom, the bed room, Tsunade's bedroom, and a tiny closet-like room with entrances to the addict and the basement- both mostly stuffed with junk. The hall itself wasn't to clean when I had first showed up, and within the week I found that it was basically the house's laundry basket. Clothes of all sorts ended up there, including the infamous green princess dress that no one knew who it belonged to or how it ended up where it always did.

I remember when everyone came home from school, which is when I met them all. It was a few moments after the tour with Pein, and we were still discussing Tsunade's rules- half of which were only loosely followed- when the group of crazy looking and psycho people came stampeding through the front door. Some acted nuts; others were just sadly weird looking.

Like the next oldest and 'second leader' of the little group was the only other girl adoptee. Konan. Konan was Pein's younger sister, by blood, she and Pein had been Tsunade's first adoptions, and she had come home a little earlier then everyone else to check on sick Pein. I always liked Konan, she was rather quite when it was a big group thing, but when she and I were alone she was like a bubbly school girl. Konan and Pein also had a classic story. Orphaned, lived off the street, and met Tsunade and her brother Jiriya on a rainy day on a bridge. Konan's oldest brother Yahiko had been really sick, and Tsunade worked as a doctor, so when the blonde mother overheard them, she demanded the pair take them to Yahiko… but when they got there he was already dead. Tsunade got all the paperwork to adopt Pein and Konan, and arranged Yahiko a proper funeral. Uncle Jiriya was a lawyer, he was the whole reason Tsunade got custody of them both since they committed misdemeanors daily to feed themselves.

Deidara was the next to come home. He… was not my cup of tea. All he really talked about was blowing things up, art, and how stupid his 'Danna' Sasori was. I _did_ like Deidara, he was pretty cool, but after waking up to explosions at 5 in the morning one too many times, I learned that a bitch slap or two would keep him down most of the time. No bombs before 8 am. So yeah, he was a pyro. But I kinda liked fire too, so I'm good with that. And he was this 'family gang's explosive expert, that was his job and he did it perfectly.

Sasori came home with him that day, too. I was ok with Sasori; he was pretty calm, casual. Unlike Deidara's long blonde hair, all to the contrast Sasori had short, messy red hair, and to oppose Deidara's sky blue eyes Sasori had a milky caramel-coffee. Sasori I do like because though he's basically bored with everyone, he could also be hilarious with his sarcasm and snarky comments. Though I did find his puppet hobby a little creepy, he was an excellent wood carver, and he and Deidara would get in random fights about art _ALL THE TIME_.

Itachi had shown up soon after Sasori and Deidara, and I assume the only reason Sasori and Deidara arrived before Itachi was because Sasori hated making people wait. Itachi was a guy I liked. Unlike the rest of these guys, he was the only one to ALWAYS make his bed, and he would do some cleaning once in a while around the places he would be found like the book shelf or he cleaned out old fridge food. He was also very punctual, but not on-the-dot like Sasori. And Itachi was rather… emotionless the first few months. I would see him walk by, or talking to someone (not really talking, just listening with occasional 'hn's and one word answers) and if we met eyes he would either blink and continue on with what he was doing, or nod a casual greeting, or mutter a 'hn'. I did eventually pick up on subtle ways to find emotion. His heel stiffened when he was angry and when he was amused there would be the slightest twitch of his lips that was really hard to see.

Itachi's best friend was the Kisame guy Pein had mentioned, and Kisame showed up beside Itachi. It was a shocker that Itachi's best friend was Kisame. The emotionless black haired Uchiha boy best friends with a giant, blue, playful freak of nature named Kisame Hoshigaki. Towering over everyone else in the family, I learned quite a bit about him in my first weeks in the house considering I played favorites with him, Konan, Sasori and Itachi. Kisame was rather awesome, if I do say so myself. Playing jokes and pranks and making you grin like it was his job. I also learned he liked to play with swords and he snuck a few drinks even though he was only 16. I also liked Kisame because he literally had blue-skin, gravity defying hair, and gill tattoos. My particular favorite thing was his teeth.

The only person younger than me, at age 15, was Tobi. He was 15 too, but he was born a month after me. Tobi was not particularly my favorite, considering he liked to scream and hug a lot, but it was good not to be the absolute youngest. Tobi also wore an eye patch around the house, but even stepping out the door he DEMANDED to wear this orange swirly mask. He was a very off kid, I tell you.

Tobi played around with Deidara a lot, but if anyone else, Zetsu was Tobi's best friend. It took me a few days to even learn Zetsu's name, because Zetsu didn't really do much. I knew he kept a garden out back, but otherwise I knew nothing –including his name- until day 6 aside from the fact he was two-colored and his hair was green. Day 6 was a rather important day during my first few weeks, because it was when I learned Zetsu was a rather interesting person indeed. I learned he was a skitz. And I learned this because he tried to murder the mail man. To this day, Zetsu still holds a grudge with the mailman like a dog.

Hidan was the last to come through the doors with Kakuzu beside him. Hidan was NOT my favorite in the family. In fact, day one, I almost killed him. I knocked his head around, and then learned he got a high from pain, and that he was purposely egging me on. So I locked him in the freezer. He was lucky Kakuzu got him out in 10 seconds after laughing a little, because when Hidan came out he was gasping for breath and shivering violently. He got no pleasure in suffocating or frost bite, and now we are frien-emies. At least now he knows I don't kid around with jack asses. It was also weird, because he called me hot and hit on me, before he learned I was his sister along with receiving a bunch of disgusted looks from Kisame, Deidara, Konan, and Pein.

Kakuzu, I found out was also one of the serious people in the group, though he found it hilarious when Hidan was unhappy. Kakuzu was also very frugal, saved up all the money he could. He also managed the money Tsunade made at her job so she could support us all. He was also rather against my adoption, but he was okay with me when he learned that I was reasonable with money. Of course I caught him stealing from people in and out of the house, so I wasn't all too surprised when I caught him trying to loot my piggy bank. None the less, I kicked his ass and demanded compensation. To which Tsunade agreed he owed me for trying to steal from me and enforced what I said, so he doesn't pick-pocket me because when he tried he ended up losing $50. I win.

It was funny that everyone was in awe of me so many times in my first few weeks. I had beaten Hidan, gotten 50 bucks from Kakuzu, and had managed to shut off Deidara's early-morning bombing. Tsunade gave me a raise in allowance for the last one, to some jealousy from others, for doing so successfully and without carnage. I did give half of what extra I was receiving to him as a reward for obeying, to which Tsunade demanded I keep my money, and Tsunade just gave Deidara a 50 dollar bill for listening. This time me and blondy BOTH win. Haha!

But before then, it was pretty hard. My first few days, I had pretty much done nothing more then 3-word replies and ignored them. This was the 4th time I had been adopted. I would ditch on day 9. Like the last 3 times. 9 was my lucky number, though looking back I guess nine isn't so lucky considering I always got caught in the next 6 days or so. Hard to hide when you have neon pink hair, you know.

I didn't really want to be here anyway. These people had their thing, and I was an outsider. I didn't belong there, in that system, in the group. in the bond they had created. It wasn't my place. If I ran away once, Tsunade would get rid of me; she was too busy to really deal with a runaway- that was my standing. So, runaway, get caught or not, id be out of this weird place full of weirdoes.

It seemed somehow Pein, Itachi, and Sasori picked up on me. Day nine was approaching, and I was being very cautious, because for days I had caught them awake at night, looking at me, or coming straight to the bed in the morning to check on me at about 2 or 3 o'clock.

Night 9 rolled in, and I yawned tiredly as I sat up, feigning having just woken up. I could just make out Itachi's stunning red eyes glowing through the dark, and both Pein and Sasori's breathing weren't quite regular for sleepers…

…

…

…

I slipped out of my bed as if I was still tired, padding clumsily toward the door after getting out of my bunk underneath Konan. I did my best to ignore the hole burned in my head from at least one pair of eyes, more likely 3.

I even yawned a second time for good measure as I stepped out of the open door, closing it behind me slowly, as if I didn't want to wake someone. In actuality this stupid, loud door I closed would be perfect. If one of them followed to keep an eye on me, I would know.

Thank you, squeaky door hinges~!

The door clacking closed, I quickly glanced through the crack between door that didn't fit in the path way and the wall, checking no one was getting up in the dim moonlight streaming through the open-curtained window.

When Sasori's silhouette sat up, and Pein's slid down the latter and Itachi's stood, I realized that they hadn't bought it at all. My pink brows furrowed, and I silently hurried down the hall, into the kitchen. I flicked on the light in the bathroom and closed the door a little loud, hoping they'd think I had just gone into the bathroom.

I pulled my school bag -emptied and filled with clothes, a blanket, and a little food- out from where I had hidden it behind the mountain of junk in the dining room. Slinging the red and white bag's strap over my shoulder, I tied my baggy black Tee around my waist tightly and hiked up my baggy silk blue pants, stepping into the boots I had hidden back here as well, before hurrying to the door.

Just as I opened the door, the _creeeeeeek_ of the bedroom door was in the air, and I hurried out as I looked back to see who was going to follow me.

I crashed into something- some_one_, I realized as arms closed around me tightly, and I looked up in shock into glowing yellow eyes. "Sakura-san?"

_HOW DID I FORGET ZETSU GARDENS AT NIGHT?!_

_**AH, YOU'RE SO STUPID!**_

_SHUT UP, YOU _ARE_ ME!_

_**A SMARTER YOU WHO WOULDN'T HAVE RUN DIRECTLY INTO ZETSU! **_

"Uh… Zetsu, can you let me go?" I asked hurriedly, though completely still. After Zetsu's skitz episode 3 days ago, I was still a little weary of him.

Zetsu's glowing sun-colored eyes looked at me curiously for a second. "Is something wrong?" his lighter half demanded, narrowing his eyes at me, then confusedly on the bag on my shoulder, and then at how my baggy clothes were secured to me as well as the boots, completely perplexed.

Not sure what more to do in this situation, I glanced to the door to see Itachi and Pein side by side, arms crossed, eyes on me, red and ringed grey, ginger and ebony black.

Zetsu looked up, following my gaze. A scowl steadily rose to his face, and Zetsu turned his head down to me. "**You were going to leave**." Not a question, a statement. His darker tone was obviously unhappy.

I looked between Zetsu, and the pair of boys, the bi-colored 16-year-old not letting me go. I snorted, pretty fed up with this. This family I didn't fit in with. This house not big enough for them let alone me too. This scene of night-time cliché. "What do you guys care? Just go away, go back to the Akatsuchi or whatever you call yourselves." I shot back angrily, trying to worm out of Zetsu's grip without success.

"Akatsuki." Sasori corrected from where I just now noticed him leaning on the wall, he must have slipped out of that window and come around the side of the house. The scold in his eyes was not a normal Sasori thing, he was usually just bored.

"I don't care! Go away, go back to sleep!" I snapped back, even angrier at the small desperation_** I**_ could even detect in my voice. "Just leave me alone!"

The look Pein gave me at this point had me pause in my squirming, the smirks and crazed laughter I was use to and the calm diplomacy were not equivalent to the fierce anger. "God has no mercy for deserters, pink child."

"Deserter?! Are you KIDDING me?! Tsunade wouldn't care if I ditched, you jerks give her enough to worry about!" I snarled at him, taken aback that even now he would try to _guilt trip_ me.

"He doesn't mean Tsunade. He means us." Sasori spat back coolly, his words sharp like ice on skin.

"You?" I repeated, scrambling again against Zetsu. "What do _you _care_, Sasori_?!"

"What do you MEAN, what do I care?!" Sasori looked completely shocked, "you're my sister, you stupid brat!"

I sniffed, "oh really! You haven't known me for even TEN DAYS!" I muttered with a glare leveled on him. "What could you possibly know about me? Nothing."

Itachi's stone gaze had not left me a second, and it was here he said the first words to me since I had shown up here, in the Senju house. "You are Haruno Sakura. The government says you are Sakura Senju, and they say you are mentally disabled, that you are clinically insane. You hate the government. Your favorite color is silver tinted slightly with red hues; you despise the color pink and other colors not in the rainbow. You're favorite animal is a cat, favorite holiday is one you made up, you're favorite jewel is the ruby, favorite flower is the knockout rose and you hate all other roses."

Pein's steady gaze melded from anger to warm certainty. "You require at least 9 inches space, or else you roll your eyes and walk away, and there is a nine somewhere on all of your shirts and the inside your shoes, and you were born on March 28th, but you tell everyone your birthday is the 29th."

Sasori's determined face remained solid as he answered "you don't like sunshine, you like the rain, and you love the wind and the feel of water. You're a pyro because you think fire defies laws of physics because it exists outside of being either a solid, liquid, or gas."

"Your favorite food is sweet dumplings and you hate spicy foods." Zetsu added with a sudden hurt look on his face, "you hate pillows and plush beds, but you love soft blankets and stuffed animals."

"You are Sakura Haruno." Itachi repeated simply.

The sudden weight of the four pairs of eyes on me person as well as all their knowledge suddenly pulled me to the floor- or Zetsu let go of me, either one.

_Sakura… Haruno… Sakura Haruno. Sakura Senju Haruno. _I DO like that name. The S.S. Haruno. Excellent.

_**So are we sailors now?**_

_Well if we are being sentimental right now I should say "no, we are Akatsuki now!" or something, right?_

…_**don't ever get deep on me again. I hate sappy stuff.**_

When I didn't move for a few minutes, contemplating, from where Zetsu had put me, they watched just me.

Pein sighed after a few moments. He picked me up like I was one of the hundreds of Origami Konan made every day and a weighed about as much as paper, and put me over his shoulder, before I was carried into the house, set on my bed, and then he dragged the covers over me. "Go to sleep."

Sasori and Zetsu slunk to their beds as Pein left the side of my own. Itachi stepped over the old, croaking carpet floor without so much as the sound of carpet rubbing his feet. "Sleep, Sakura-hime." Itachi said in a low, soft velvet voice. "You are welcome among the Akatsuki, either Haruno or Senju."

I looked at him for a minute, "how did you know all that? How did you all know that stuff?"

A coy smile, the first id ever seen on Uchiha Itachi's face, appeared. "Like Sasori said. We are your brothers. We read your diary like any other brothers."

I gapped as Itachi stepped up the ladder for his bed, but then I ended up laughing lightly before passing out.

The next morning, Itachi would deny smiling, and no one said anything to the others about that night. But I would still be welcome in Akatsuki. Because I was Akatsuki. Sakura Senju Haruno, Akatsuki member.

…

…

…

So yeah. I told you day 9 is lucky. Day 9 isn't meant for running away, though, it was meant for joining Akatsuki. Where I gained 9 brothers.

Oh, and Konan, I gained a sister.

Oh, and a mom. A mom too.

Well, I guess the point of this… prologue-chapter thing that was this chapter is that yes, I fit in here even though I didn't think so. And I gotta say, I do love them, even if I hate them. It's completely unwritten that I, a pink haired girl who is a foretold pyromaniac, double personalitied and number-9-addicted teen will fit in as the sister of 10 complete creepers who like puppets, money, and origami who call themselves god or artists. And a blue guy. He's a smurf's and a shark's love child, which is ALSO unwritten.

Not just unwritten. It's not repeatable. It can't be planned. It's unimaginable, impossible, indescribable, and… Unscriptable.


	2. Announcement! (not part of story)

**announcement to all readers from Neko-sama**

Syrian Arab Revar  
Mauritius  
Bulgaria  
Kuwait  
Bosnia and Herzegovina

you see those places i listed? those are all places i have NEVER EVEN HEARD OF.

yet somehow, i have at least 2 readers following me from those places.

my precious babies i love you all so very much. after 2 months of inactivity you still comment within the first 10 minutes of a story TWELVE TIMES.

there are some people i would like to personally promote.

you people have praised the crummy song lyrics i made up in some of them, even one of my precious extra cup-cake-y followers sang it and put it on youtube,

_Reira Honjo._

you people give me and the Rebel Queens the comments of a lifetime, hilarious and praising and detailed and perfect.

_MinaBlahBlahBlahAnimeFan_ for your hilarity and constant reviews.

_Babybroant_ for being a dedicated reader.

_Guest: Connie Davis_ for being so attached to my stories.

_Akatsukilover15_ for being a complete cookie for taking on my poor orphaned story 'Yours Truely'.

_KarrineWinchester_ for your frequent reviews, i can count on your appearance.

_asredwer_ fore your honesty and help in spotting my mishaps

_moonloonstar _for your detailed reviewing in 'speechless' and other, i love to read those longer reviews so much!

i love you all, as well as all my others who take the time to AT LEAST type 'write soon' or 'love it'. it makes my day when every two weeks i get to come and see your beautiful words and i read them ALL. i even respond once in a while, so if you ask a question just stick it in a review and it SHALL be answered!

and remember how much i love you ALL!


	3. Chapter 3

**Unscriptable**

Well… welcome back. I find it… very odd you strange people are so interested in my life.

What, don't you have lives of your own or something?

Weirdoes.

But, I guess I can't leave you losers hanging, now could I? Not very… 'Lady like' of little miss Sakura Haruno, not that I've ever been lady like.

Let's see, a little story of my wonder-filled wonderful life. So many big things happened after I joined the Akatsuki family. Lots of laughter. Terrible tears. Entrancing encounters. It must just have something to do with the fact that I was adopted into a family full of freaks who had a knack for illegal shit.

… Yeah, that's probably why.

Not that I am- or ever have been- a completely innocent angel, ne?

However before my family, the worst I had ever done was runaway from those stupid adoption homes and filthy orphanages, I flooded one of my principle's offices in middle school, and I had the habit of being a pick-pocket ALL THE TIME.

So yeah I could keep up with my insufferable brother's pranks when they were just starting to test the waters in bugging me. And yeah, same for the beginning of our little delinquent excursions…

…

…

…

I woke up late at night about a week or so after my little night-time bonding with Pein, Itachi, and Sasori, and literal-run-in with Zetsu. The reason I had awoken, per se? Only the movement of my body, which for some reason was jolted off the bed so sharply I felt like I was going to hurl.

In a few seconds I was rolled in a sheet from my bed, and my shouts of curses muffled by a SERIOUSLY oversized hand.

**It has to be Kisame, there's no other creature on earth that giant!**

_God damn it Kisame ill ring your neck in your sleep! Ill feed you Shark Fin soup! Ill drown you in a toilet!_

These vocal threats had gone unheard as anything other than muffled muttering, though I tossed and turned so violently, Kisame was most definitely getting the message.

"Jeeze she acts like we are going to kill her, un." I heard Deidara's non-to-quite whispers, and in complete fury I lashed out with my sheet-burritoed-feet together, and I knocked him so hard in the gut I heard all air leave his body.

_Score, dickface!_

_**Oh, what now SON?! In your FACE!**_

_Uh, Inner he's our brother not our son, you idiot. And technically it's in his stomach, not his face._

_**Fuck off, I was enjoying myself.**_

_When do you not?_

Whatever, I couldn't care less about Inner at the moment.

"OWWWWW, YEAH!" Deidara's yelp was rather satisfying, especially when everyone laughed at him. "She fucking kicked me, un!" he stage-whispered angrily, and Sakura snorted from inside her blanket prison.

She squirmed sharply, managing a brief word when Kisame's hand was out of place- "CASTRATION!"

A single word was enough to make the chest she was pressed tightly against tighten with stiffness.

_**Yeah, bitch is afraid.**_

_He better be scarred shitless or ill actually do it._

"Luckily I'm a female." Came Konan's indignant voice, mixed with annoyance and humor. "You idiots can suffer."

"Ah, shut up bitch, this is fucking supposed to be fun." Hidan's voice even _sounded_ like he was smirking. Smug bastard.

I managed to lash out again, thoroughly happy with the connection of my heel to his face, before a second pair of arms and another bulky chest were pinning my feet completely still.

While Hidan continued to curse, the newer chest rumbled as Kakuzu's voice spoke, "Stop attacking people. Medical bills are expensive."

_Stop attacking people?! I'M THE ONE WHO'S BEEN ATTACKED!_

Spitting in fury, I jostled about crazily, and the pair of males clutched very tightly to keep from dropping me by accident.

Fuck you two and your super-strong muscle shit.

I felt myself being moved, now carried out of the door, to god knew where, with the large amount of footsteps of all my siblings just behind, and a pair, give or take, in front of me. Tsunade's heavy snoring filled my hearing as the others grew silent.

Well so now I was being kidnapped from the house I tried and failed to run away from.

_**Fucking great.**_

And I agreed with inner: this was complete bull. I was loaded oh-so-gracefully into the back seat of the giant white van- you know, like the ones they use for group trips or country clubs or something like that with 15 seats- in Kakuzu and Kisame's clasping arms, while the vehicle rocked with each new person climbing in.

Tobi called shot gun, and Konan was asking Pein if she could drive, to which he relented and agreed. Much to everyone's horror, because Konan was NUTS when driving. I still think she was that hit-and-run serial killer from two years ago.

So after a scream-filled drive in which I thought I was going to die not knowing what we crashed into, I was unloaded and carried into the cold night air, successfully kicking Sasori once when Kakuzu had dropped his guard. Haha, take that you fucker.

When the fresh cold night air was replaced with musky, somewhat warmer air, I couldn't help wondering WHERE these idiots had brought me.

I was dropped on something of a couch, and finally the arms were no longer restraining me, and I ripped my way out of the blanket burrito and in the process I tumbled onto a hard concrete floor that chilled my skin.

A warehouse, broken windows and brick walls, holes in the ceiling. Old furniture in the little area of it I was in now, and the rest full of factory equipment and other machinery, stairs leading upward to what must have once been a second floor but was now only rafters with boards across them. Better yet, my derpy siblings standing around and most of them grinning.

I leaped at the nearest- Tobi- clawing at the face hidden behind the orange mask that I ripped off, revealing the eye-patch and adorably small face. That boy's face could USE a few more scars. I was and still am happy to oblige.

While Tobi squealed, many laughed while Pein dragged me off like the good little peace keeper he was, and in turn I bit and clawed as his hand like a ravenous kitten. He looked thoroughly unaffected. "God shall punish you." Was all I remember him saying before throwing me back onto the couch again and muttering "later, anyway."

I snorted, chucking a soda can on the couch at him. "I'll take my chances."

"Gosh, pinky, you're so difficult." Kisame prodded my back, grinning his toothy grin.

"Don't touch me, I'm famous." I responded, slapping his hand away. "Now why the fudge-pop am I here?"

"Cause this is the base." Sasori responded with a sour chuckle, still grumpy from when I kicked his head on the way in.

"Ooohhhhh a 'base'. You got a tree house for your group, too, there, Pinocchio?" I chortled. "What are ya, a group of 5 year olds?"

Deidara scoffed, "no, that's just Tobi, yeah."

Tobi cheered gleefully.

I rolled my eyes, "well couldn't we have shown up in the DAY TIME? I was SLEEPING."

"Should have just kept sleeping. That's what happened when we kidnapped Itachi." Konan pointed out, earning chuckles.

I laughed along at my older brother's expense, to which the Uchiha just ignored.

After which, they explained they hung out here all the time- before and after school, at night on weekends or nights of 'activities'- of course I learned later that 'activities' didn't _just_ mean nights out for bars but also their gang business meetings- and other occasions. It was a rather new place, in fact, and Akatsuki had taken it up 3 weeks ago, having been using an abandoned house before, but it had been bulldozed.

I was allowed to wander it with them following along. Only that one corner had been really touched apart from the rafters.

That is and always was my favorite part of the whole place. My brothers and sister followed me up the stairs, but did not follow as hopped around the rafters, taking little brides of new boars stretch across gaps you could jump. Where there was a window, there was a pile of bricks and a large board to stand on. Ready for a defense, I assumed, though even then I wondered why they didn't use guns since I know all of us- yup, me and Tsunade included- sleep with a pistol under our pillows and a knife of some sort under out mattresses.

Tsunade was paranoid, that had been HER idea. Way to go, mom, again, you're the _best parent ever_.

I loved jumping around up there. You could see in all directions- left right, ahead, behind, above and BELLOW. It would be impossible to sneak up on me up there. And something about high places have always been my favorite…

It took them 45 minutes to coax me down, and only when Deidara came to try to get me but slipped and almost died, so I helped him down and agreed to enjoy it later.

It was also that night, that I underwent my first situation of a gang attack.

It was only 5 minutes after I had come down from the rafters, when Zetsu- who had been 'on guard'- shouted that a group of black-dressed teens were approaching in the shadows with weapons. A group they had called 'the animals'.

Itachi had promptly dragged me back to the stairs, and told me to go to a board at a window while he, Tobi, and Konan went to the other three of the four. The rest pulled out weapons, much to my surprise.

Pein waited, and then gave the order for me and the others to fire: "DELIVER JUDGEMENT" he shouted.

"AYE!" Konan, Itachi, and Tobi had muttered, taking bricks in each hand. I copied a second later, leaning out my window, and looked for something to aim at.

I spotted a blonde haired boy in black easily, his hair sticking out like a reflector on a road way. I pelted my brick at him, and grinned wildly when he stopped trying to get through the lower window, grabbing his head and wailing.

There was a black haired boy beside him, who slapped a hand over his mouth, but too late. Me and my siblings started pelting the pair rapidly, only stopping to hit three others- a girl with bright red hair, a boy with white-blue hair, and another with black.

I noticed that Sasori had rolled out of the building, mid fight with a person with a weird shiny black bowl cut and the only one not dressed in black- instead a green jumpsuit.

I blinked, the weird outfit was VERY noticeable, but despite the person's lack of stealth he was fairing strongly against Hidan, beating his face in.

Now, I may be a bitch. But ever since that night, I claimed these morons as my family. And no one. Hurts my family.

In my rage, I jumped off my rafter and onto the couch below me, Konan and Sasori both shouting. Down here on the first floor, everyone was fighting. However, it was all very un-fair, but in favor of my family- there were two to every 1 of them.

However, when I hurried to the door, there were now three of them against Sasori. The red head was a splendid fighter, but the green kid, blonde, and the red haired girl were strong, too, and there were 3 of them.

I screeched angrily, nailing the blonde in the face hard enough to knock him clear of the group, satisfied with my punch but nowhere near done.

Sasori grabbed the girl with red hair's hand and yanked her down when she attempted to hit me, but I could not thank him as I was suddenly finding myself faced with the green person.

He hesitated to hit me, which infuriated me, and I made the first move, using the brick still in my hand from upstairs by slamming it harshly into his cheek. "Don't try and touch my brother if you can't face ME!" I snarled, angrily, as he held his face in shock.

His bushy eyebrows were staring to creep me out now that I was so close to him.

He stared in my direction. "My name is Rock Lee, and I shall take you down without mercy if you do not stand aside, ma'am." He responded.

I growled angrily, and 'lee' nodded his assent that I wasn't to back down, and lunged at me. He kicked, _hard_, at my stomach, but in retaliation and despite being winded, I gripped it tightly. He tried to retch away as I sucked in, but my strong arms and fingers held him there, before I swung him by the leg and let go.

He slammed into the wall of the brick building, and I did not wait to sweep-kick his head, hard enough to knock it clean off if I aimed to, but he managed last moment to shift and it hit his shoulder.

There was a sickening crack, and Lee let out a loud shout, and mine came in tune with it. I must have just broken a tow, because afterward I couldn't put weight on it. On the bright side, I had broken 'Lee's' _entire arm_, which was now useless.

The injuries stopped neither of us, and we threw punches and kicks with our good limbs. He managed a clean fist to my face, knocking me down atone instant, but then a second later I swept his feet out from under him.

None the less, he fixed his balance and did get back to his feet quicker. He hesitated in action once again, and I took his foot, swinging him down in an arch into the ground. In the process I twisted his ankle uselessly.

At this point, Sasori- who had been attacked by the blonde guy and the girl and was just now free of them both after the girl ran off and the blonde knocked unconscious, grabbed me and helped me up.

Sasori and I faced lee as he jumped up, keeping off one foot. Lee's gaze flickered to the blonde boy downed on the side walk, and he cursed under his breath.

When he looked at us again, threatening him with glares, he dipped his head. There was an odd… respect… in his eyes as he announce, "I resign this battle. I look forward to a different one." And hurried off to drag the blonde away.

I finally noticed most of the fights were over; only Hidan and Deidara chasing off the last few people.

Pein stopped Lee in the process of his carrying Naruto away. "Tell Sasuke that he best not show here again." He warned. "God will not be so forgiving of your sins."

Lee paused, confused at Pein's way of speaking, but seemed to know he was referring to himself as god a moment later, and said something strange in response. "Your new sister is a fine one, Pein-san." Then he left with Naruto over his shoulder, glancing back at me with this twinkle in his eye that disturbed me so greatly…

"I think Saku-chan just got a stalker." Konan cooed loudly from the window.

Sasori- whom was more of a dad than a brother- darkened. "Sakura-chan's too young for boyfriends."

I laughed crazily at him, "stupid, I'm a month younger than you."

Sasori snorted. "Still."

I just snorted at him, "gee, _daddy_, take a pill."

Sasori scoffed, however, Itachi was the first to ask, "Oh, so your actually interested in that weirdo?" from his window.

I shivered, earning laughter, "no way."

And that was my first gang battle, and how I met Lee, Rock Lee, who would cause so much trouble in the future.

And at first, I respected him as a decent fighter… to think Lee would be so troublesome-

-That he would end up dead?


End file.
